My ex-boyfriend’s been calling me a lot, and I think he wants to get back together. But I don’t know – I’m thinking about just getting a Pleo instead. Here’s my logical analysis of the situation:
Pleo costs $349.
That’s a pretty solid chunk of change. But I spent $200 the day my boyfriend’s car got towed after he illegally parked outside the comic book store. And I can drop more than fifty bucks in just one night of buying him drinks ($9 Makers Marks, $6 Jim Beams once he’s too drunk to realize he’s no longer getting Makers Mark.)
Pleo has beat detection (allows Pleo to dance and listen to music).
Pleo wants to take me dancing! Well, point against Pleo – I fucking hate dancing. Sorry to disappoint, but who did you think you were in a relationship with? A USC sorority girl? Some two-cent stripper? Ellen DeGeneres?
Pleo does not have facial recognition, meaning he can’t tell you apart from others by face.
At first glance, I thought this would be a point for my boyfriend, but I’ve since reconsidered. When Pleo tells me “It’s dark in this bar, and I swear I thought the blonde with the D-cup was you,” I’ll know he’s telling the truth.
(Pleo is also much less likely to give me shit for going for that cheap joke.)
Pleo was engineered by a group of robotics specialists, animators, technologists, scientists, biologists, and programmers.
My boyfriend was “engineered” by a part-time mortgage consultant and a cocktail waitress on her smoke break.
Pleo has an orientation tilt sensor for body position and eight touch sensors (head, chin, shoulders, back, feet).
Irrelevant. What? What did you guys think I was gonna do with my Pleo? Sickos!